on personal style
(but mostly feeling at home in your body & your clothing)
Many months ago, I had a friend, who was asking for “fashion advice”.
I tried to explain my approach to style and clothing to her as we walked around Japan shopping for pieces. She was so disinterested in something that she couldn’t easily copy or buy. Which made me annoyed, but I understand that people have different life experiences that lead them to that point.
We’ve all met those types of people. Blah blah blah. You can’t buy taste. Blah blah.
But in an attempt to transform my annoyance into something kinder —
For free, I can offer you this:
you must get to know your body and it’s movements. what does your body (and soul) need to feel free? what does your body need to glow? what does your body need to feel protected?
how often do you wear down your favorite items? do they have longevity? do you ever repair them? do you buy replacements?
what items of clothing do you feel most comfortable in? why?
what items of clothing do you feel most confident in? why?
are there items that fit at the intersection of both criteria?
can you style them together or interchangeably?
a wardrobe can be a series of different complimentary silhouettes. different identities. or characters. think… barbie. but instead, you’re in the soul of those outfits.
no one else can replace the soul aspect of your wardrobe.
it’s time to stop trying to be someone else. enter: a continuous personal journey of being at home in your body.
when do you feel most alive in your body? when do you feel most at ease? what aspects of your environment enable this presence? what aspects of your clothing do?
walk outside. try things on in-person as often as possible. touch fabrics. observe the style of passersby (over online photos, always). don’t get trigger happy if it’s not exactly right. sit with it. travel to different cities and places. try on clothes there. be curious… it will lead you to hidden gems. repeat until eternity.
online window shop. look at archive pieces and old runway shots. gather them in a personal folder or board to reflect upon.
listen to interviews with designers & stylists you admire. how did they develop their points of view? which of their guiding principles resonate with your body’s experience? with your soul’s?
train your algorithm to show you what will compliment your body, your taste, and your intuition… which is starting to get stronger. repeat & refine until eternity.
signal amongst the noise. discern the micro-trend that will last a season (and ultimately, chases a fake high) from things that will stay in your life for a long time.
do you like the way everyone wears the piece? or do you like the way it feels & looks on you? can you see yourself working it into multiple outfits? for how long will that last?
but don’t be afraid to buy things if they feel right.
if you change your mind about an item, you can always return, resell, or gift it to someone else who may enjoy it more than you.
my friend gabi has this theory that clothing holds energy. i think she’s right.
there will be certain pieces you feel grounded and confident in. and pieces that were meant to be good on the surface (and look perfectly fine), but they never end up feeling right. and funny enough, there will be pieces that you get laid in more often than others.
clothing affects your mood and your psyche on a level i don’t think we fully grasp yet. what pieces and corresponding feelings come to mind?
there will be fabrics that calm you and feel good on your skin.
there will be fabrics that last a very long time.
this is just as important as the silhouette and versatility of a piece of clothing.
clothing is personal. like a diary. a sketchbook. or your own body of work.
an intimate relationship with yourself always forges a path toward a more intuitive relationship with your outward style & your inward taste.
be patient. we’re always becoming. it never ends.
anyways, goodbye <3 fi